14 Things Most Southerners Do Posted by: Rod Ford | 1 Comment
It’s hard to say if these things are genetic or just so steeped in tradition that they’re inherited environmentally from generation to generation. It’s probably the latter, though, right? We won’t bring Darwin into this, but we will bring Johnny Cash eating cake. Because everyone should see that at least once.
And now, for your enjoyment, here’s 14 habits nearly every Southerner has.
1. Deep fry everything, from butter to beer…
2. … then put it on a stick, because who needs silverware when “forks” grow on trees.
3. Ingeniously attach our June wedding programs to popsicles sticks.
4. Put on shorts the second the thermometer breaks 68 degrees.
5. Start shivering the second the thermometer dips below 68 degrees.
6. Find a way to monogram anything and everything.
7. Attempt to make a meal out of honeysuckle.
8. Wave to strangers on the curvy back highways.
9. Have tan lines in January.
10. Require closed captioning when we land a national reality TV show documenting our shenanigans.
11. Have lush, luxurious lawns, even during drought advisories.
12. Think sitting outside the arena with a TV in the back of our truck is just as good as having front row seats.
13. Know beer can be a fashion accessory, as long as you’ve got an efficient koozie necklace. (Or a beer holster. Just sayin’)
14. And finally, we’ve kept seersucker in style for almost 100 years.
Anything you’d add to this list?
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